One of my favorite verses here lately is James 1:4. For some reason the whole idea that everything I am going through is working toward an end is a huge comfort for me. I am not one of those people who can stand still for long periods of time. I don’t like to feel like I’m spinning my wheels. I don’t like to feel like what I am doing is an endless repeat of life. I do not like ruts, and I do not like to continually face the same thing over and over again feeling like I have already faced it once before. Case in point, I don’t like feeling like I am stuck in the same mood that I have already felt victory over.
What I have been through lately has been very difficult, not just for me but for others as well. It is hard to watch as those around you find it easy to pick up and move on when you feel like you are still sitting down. Perhaps its the fear of being left behind. Perhaps its the fear of being left out of something. The fact is, once you have surrendered to God’s will, you aren’t being left behind, and you aren’t being left out. Rather your path is something entirely different and new. Yes the things I have been through have been very difficult and painful, I have the scars to prove it. What I have to come to realize is that my situation is unique. While I may be seeing everyone else move on and feel as if I am still sitting still, I am indeed not.
Here is where the words of James come to mind. Perseverance must finish its work. Things have to be finished in me. It is not my job to envy those around me, rather focus on what I have laid out before me. What is it that I am supposed to learn? Now the tricks of the human mind want us to say why me this isn’t fair. I don’t, however, recall anything about fairness in regards to how the world moves. God moves at His pace for His reasons. Sure, it is maddening to feel like you haven’t gone anywhere, but this is where focus is lost. When you look at where you have not gone, you miss where it is you have gone. It is a trick of the mind to get hung up on what you feel you should have and not see what it is you actually have. If you feel like you are in the same place, maybe you need to be asking what it is you are supposed to be learning? Ask what are you lacking, and what does God want to give you?
For me it has been humility, forgiveness, and patience. I could add to that gratefulness, and even peace in moments of the storm. Point is, perseverance is working toward its work. It is my job, your job to stay faithful in these moments. Looking around at everyone else will do you no good. Looking at Jesus, however, will give you exactly what you need.
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